


is your love real or is it a way to hurt me

by petitlionhomme



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst and Porn, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Emotional Manipulation, Heavy Angst, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Possessive Behavior, Unhealthy Relationships, seems a little dub con in some scenes so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 16:43:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18056252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/petitlionhomme/pseuds/petitlionhomme
Summary: Yut-Lung wished he could have seen through Ash, he wished he could hate him too.Please heed the tags <3





	is your love real or is it a way to hurt me

**Author's Note:**

> The italics are past events in which led up to or give some insight to the current, ongoing events of the story.

“Does it hurt?”

 

“Ash, Ash stop-“

 

“No.”

 

Yut-Lung swallowed back tears, hands clutching the sheets. Of course it didn’t hurt, it never hurt because Ash would never hurt him, physically, at least.

 

But that didn’t mean he’d listen to his words.

 

Ash wasn’t moaning, panting or gasping. Sometimes he was so cold and clinical when he enticed Yut-Lung into his bed but he went out of his way to see how many ways he could make Yut-Lung cry, to make him whimper and beg, for whatever sadistic reason filled his head.

 

* * *

 

 

_“You’re pretty,” The blond before him had a loving smirk on his face, the scent of coffee and pastries lingered in his hair, green eyes that made his heart warm but there was something about him.. He didn’t belong._

 

* * *

 

 

“Fuck- Fuck.” Ash was moaning into his ear, hands tight on Yut-Lung’s hips. His lips trailed down to the tight black collar around his throat and he kissed the leather.

 

“Mine, mine, mine..” He chanted softly, tears filling Yut-Lung’s eyes as he did so. Ash was mean, he was temperamental and liked to bruise Yut-Lung’s neck with hickies like he was property.

 

He supposed that he was.

 

* * *

 

 

_“Have you ever been touched like this?”_

_”No, I haven’t. I’m a virgin, remember?”_

_”Then I’ll make you see stars.”_

 

* * *

 

 

Ash was the one being fucked tonight, on his chest and knees as he held tight to Yut-Lung’s collar, the one accessory that had taken so much from him.

 

“Deeper, fuck.” He pushed back and Yut-Lung cried out, planting his hands on either side of Ash’s head as he pressed shaky kisses to his skin, thrusts turning into slow rolls of his hips, just as Ash had taught him.

 

“Anything for you.” It tasted like a broken promise, like a hard lie.

 

* * *

 

 

_”You’re mine.”_

_”Ash, I’m my own person! You can’t keep doing this! You can’t just lock me away whenever you feel insecure!”_

_Ash didn’t hit him, he punched the wall instead and broke skin, panting hard. “You’re mine.” He glared over his shoulder at him and a cold feeling slid down Yut-Lung’s spine. “And I’ll just have you show you that.”_

 

* * *

 

 

Ash was gentle sometimes when the days had been hard on Yut-Lung or when the person he’d been before would seep through. He’d have his head between Yut-Lung’s legs for hours, making his cum with his mouth and fingers until he was sobbing before he would cuddle him to his chest and say sweet words.

 

He’d say: “I love you.”, “I need you.” and “I’m sorry.”

 

Yut-Lung would cry, sometimes, because on those days, the collar would disappear before he even woke up and Ash would be quietly staring at him, a broken look on his pretty face.

 

On those days, Yut-Lung wasn’t an object, something to merely be owned, he was a person.

 

On days like that, he loved Ash too.

 

“Ah-“ Yut-Lung pushed his hips back, moaning loudly when Ash’s fingers pushed deeper and he smiled up at his black-haired lover. “I’m cumming, yes-“ His eyes rolled back, his thighs shook and his breath was short, pleasure short circuiting his system.

 

”Did you like that?” Ash asked, pressing a kiss to Yut-Lung’s back, his hand gripping his now soft cock. “Oh? Can’t cum anymore?”

 

”Three times is enough, I believe.” He said with a small laugh and it felt normal, it all felt so normal. He wasn’t even wearing that damn collar, but he wasn’t foolish enough to think that they could stay like this.

 

They craved that darkness, reveled in it, and perhaps, they could only survive when they were hurting each other. 

 

Ash seemed to realize what he was thinking about a sad look crossed his face. “I’m so sorry, Yut-Lung.. I’ve.. hurt you. I’ve been hurting you.” He stopped touching him and sat back on his calves and shook his head. “Take the car.. Leave.. and don’t come back.” He whispered. Yut-Lung’s head spun.

 

it was so sudden, so quick, and he almost said yes, he nearly jumped from the bed and running for the door but the look on his face was so broken, so devastated and disgusted that he.. He simply couldn’t.

 

”I love you, Aslan.” He told him with a little sigh. “And you.. _We_ , we will get better.”

 

He wished he’d he could believe it. Ash was far too possessive, for too harsh and cruel at times, for Yut-Lung to even envision a future where everything went well but if saying that it would meant seeing Ash’s eyes light up like that, he’d say anything to keep him happy.

 


End file.
